Behold the Power of Cheese

...and by cheese, I mean food. Seriously. What is it? Usually when I am in any kind of emotional turmoil (anxiety, nervousness, sad, upset, yada yada) I loose all appetite and don't eat for weeks at a time. But for some apparent reason (I'm gonna blame hormones, because that's what I blame everything unknown on) for the last three months I've been eating everything in sight. I get upset and cry then I make a pie so I can eat it. I ate a whole pie in three days. I went through an entire package of double stuff oreos (that I went on a 0200 emergency grocery store trip to buy) in 3 hours. With peanut butter on top. That's just the kind of last few months I've had. For some reason my body decided to go backwards from normal and I have become an emotional eater. My hips and my now slightly snug clothing realize this is a bad idea, and I realize that it's not the greatest coping mechanism, but it is what it is.

So for the last week I've put myself back on a diet. The thing is, excuse my french, I become a homicidal bitch if I haven't eaten all day. Seriously. I hate people (everyone) and my life and my job and ...well, everything. I realized this at work the other day when I was having a terrible day for no apparent reason. I wanted to stab people in the eyeballs (don't lie, we've all been there) and everything just irritated me! Luckily, my roommate took subconscious pity on my poor coworkers when she surprised me at work with real food. Moral of the story, it's not worth my mental health to starve myself. Running: great. Dieting: not so much. So I'll just have to strive harder to not make the key lime pie and eat the entire thing in three days time. No more midnight runs to get double stuff oreos that I can coat in delicious peanut butter and put myself in a food induced happy state. Just eating like normal and exercising. Sigh. But I might not kill anyone intentionally this way ;)