Friday, October 24, 2008

Mickey and Minnie Visit the Jungle

Yeah. Next in my tales from the Jungle (aka work for those of you who missed the last story --and shame on you, it was a good one): Why Asian-IvyLeague-underage college students shouldn't drink while dressed up as Mickey and Minnie Mouse. That's right folks, once again, you can't make this stuff up! Thankfully last night at work, we were so painfully slow that the entire department was able to sit back and laugh at the hilarity that was my patient. Our friendly FDNY ambulance crew brings us a 20 year old female who had been drinking, passed out, fell down and hit her head on concrete. She was caught and assisted to the ground by her boyfriend. This is a common every night run-of-the-mill story until you take into account that the girl was a Japanese Minnie Mouse. Ears and all (including dress tights and shoes). And her boyfriend who drunkenly stumbled in behind the ambulance crew was dressed as a Japanese Mickey Mouse, spandex, ears and all. We get her moved onto our stretcher and plan to let her sleep it off since there appear to be no obvious injuries. We flop her into standard passed out drunk position, with the head of her bed elevated 30 degrees so that when she vomits she won't suck the stomach acid laden alcohol into her lungs. I start her IV, draw basic labs, and start the bolus-ing of saline --all while she is sleeping. The resident is getting the story from the still intoxicated but rather helpful boyfriend. We like the boyfriend. We feel good about clearing the girl to go home under his care asap. As the resident is talking to Mickey, Minnie --in her passed out state --vomits. For those of you who have never seen and/or smelled alcohol vomit, it's a special experience. Highlighted by rancid bits of whatever food they chose to eat in an ill attempt to sober more quickly. It's not pleasant. And since she is passed out, the vomit doesn't projectile across the room --thank goodness --I would have been in the line of fire. Instead in just oozes and dribbles down her chin and throat downward to her neck and backward in her ears and hair. Are you seeing the comedy in this situation? Is it just because I've been up for a while and had a really boring night? I've got a vomit and alcohol covered Minnie Mouse passed out drunk on a stretcher while Mickey Mouse attempts to drunkenly explain the happenings of the evening to the baby doctor. It doesn't get any better than this. One of my coworkers begins to sing the theme song to the Mickey Mouse Club in the background. I find this funny. I cannot contain my giggles. Nor can any of the other staff within ear shot. Next while we all rolled our eyes, the baby docs decide that we need to order more labs and a CT scan because the girl isn't acting right. Well, she isn't acting right because she is insanely drunk, and still being under the legal drinking age doesn't have a whole lot of experience being that drunk. She's not going to act normal. She was acting much more normal than any of the other drunks that we get. Stupid baby docs. So three hours later Minnie has been medically cleared via CT scan, meaning that when she can walk with a steady gait, she can go. She wakes up soon there-after, and is indeed ready to go. She doesn't understand why she is dressed as Minnie Mouse, nor why she is so cold. We recount the last 4 hours of her life for her, and "road test" her. She is indeed ready to go. So baby doc tries to wake up Mickey. And tries again. Turns out Mickey is passed out drunk, and doesn't want to wake up. We are contemplating giving a quick banana bag iv to mickey even though he is not technically a patient --ya know, like a buy one get one free type of deal. Minnie does not like this idea because she is cold and wants to go home. Luckily Mickey woke up, had a steady gait, and they were both able to leave. As they were leaving, Matt, the other nurse on my team turns to me shaking his head ans says, "See. This is why Asians shouldn't drink." Matt is Korean. When I look at him with one eyebrow raised, he says, "Yeah, me included, I haven't been Mickey Mouse before, but I'm not a good drunk either." I SOO wish that is wasn't unethical on so many levels to take a picture of them both passed out in full costume! You'll all just have to use your imaginations!
In other Jungle news, we were so bored last night that we had a fantastic time online. There is a great website that I don't technically remember the name of but you can get there through the website I'm about to tell you about. It's where I'm getting all your christmas presents --it's great or something like that (that's right Kristin, you can actually see what you're getting and I won't make it be a surprise!). Back to being bored at work, last night we discovered that one of the nurses we work with was left by his wife a couple days ago. Now, the great thing about New York is that we don't sit around gossipping behind his back and telling each other how sorry we are for him, and telling everyone but him that we wished there was something we could do for him. Marvin, the charge nurse, says, (and I quote) "Well hell, John! You need another wife? I'll find ya one! C'mere!" Marvin then googles 'mail order brides' and it turns out there is a website So we all (John included) laughed and joked about the pros and cons of mail order brides from various countries. This naturally progressed to finding a mail order husband website so that half of us didn't feel excluded. Ladies and gentlemen, I have found the man I'm going to marry. His name is Bertram (Sarah, I know you're proud of me already). And he's from Canada, which would make Josh proud (he remains convinced that I'm Canadian because I don't like milk or ice cream.) Unfortunately I can't copy his picture from the web page, and when I try to take a picture of it with my camera it just comes out blurry and thus does not do the glory that is my future husband justice. I can copy the personal by his picture though:

Name: Bertram

Clyde seeks Bonnie to be partners in crime... I am a trouble maker! Techno-hedonist prone to psychobabble and taking stupid risks. Fun craving, riot inciting, thrill seeking geek girls preferred. Choir girls need not apply, because I plan on committing a few sins and misdemeanors in my time. I got booted off for cyber stalking but I'm better now.

It's a match made in heaven! You'll just have to check out the picture for yourself. Trust me, you want to!!! Go to now scroll down till you see Bertram. And my fellow single friends, don't be shy if you see one you like. Maybe we can get a package deal. They have all been assigned to teams already, Bertram is mine, but bonus points if you can guess who gets whom on who's team and why :) We really shouldn't be allowed to get bored at work.

Oh, and one more random tidbit of why I love New York. As I mentioned before with John's wife, you just say what is on your mind here. It's total blunt honesty in a way that is refreshing and impossible to find anywhere else in the country. A prime example of this was a headline in the paper that I got in the morning on the way home from work yesterday. I took a picture so you'd all be able to share :) It's pretty self explanatory.

Have a nice day :)

Monday, October 20, 2008

I've heard it said...

So there I was. Driving in my rental car up I-5 through the traditionally icky Seattle traffic. This is made worse by the fact that I not only forgot that no one is in a hurry to get anywhere there AND I have been living in NYC where EVERYONE is in an urgent frantic hurry to get wherever they are going (usually nowhere). So I tried my best to relax and not be in a hurry and recover my buried west-coast laid-back attitude. It wasn't going well. I was so excited to see all my friends that I could barely contain myself. Traffic wasn't actually that bad, but it wasn't moving fast enough for me --I had places to be and people to see that I hadn't seen in WAY too long!! It was amazing to me as I was driving up the road and I came around the corner of a hill and the Seattle Skyline came into view on the right with Elliott Bay and all the long shore ports on the left that I was home. I felt like I was literally driving home after a long vacation and I was relieved and excited and at peace in a way that I can't describe to be back. I have been fortunate enough to make many friends everywhere I've been and I still keep in touch with most of them. Some are closer than others. To me the true test of the type of friendship is what happens when you're miles apart. With my closest friends we might as well have never been apart. We can pick up right where we left off without missing a beat or a moment of awkward pause --whether it's been a day week months or years since we were last together. I was not surprised to find that this is how many of my Seattle friends were. It was so wonderful to see everyone again and to have it seem like nothing changed! To chat and play like"the good old days" of two months ago when this was my every day life. It made me so very grateful for the friends that I have been blessed with-- In Seattle and everywhere. I just wanted to take a minute to attempt to express my gratitude for you. It can't be done, really, but know that I love you all and think of you all often, and I am more grateful for you than you could ever know. As per my latest vacation "home" --a couple examples. Siobhan is still the other half of my brain. We are still essentially the same person with a few (but vitally important according to some) differences. It felt like life was finally back to normal having her in the car with me and shopping for brownie mixes and ice cream at 3:00 in the morning. It felt so normal that I literally was confused when she was directing me back to her apartment so that I could drop her off before I went back to the airport. I forgot that she wasn't coming with me, and (surprise ;) ) I cried just a bit. Dinners with friends literally had conversations that picked up right where we left off without missing a beat. I spent 4-5 utterly delightful hours at a football game with Josh where we talked and joked and laughed and played like the good old days. And I will be eternally grateful (and a little bit pissed of) to him for introducing me to polish sausage with cream cheese. Don't knock it till you've tried it. You'll be hooked too! The only problem is you can't get them outside of Seattle! I also stopped by work and was immediately welcomed by warm hugs from Amber and Dr. Milne and Tooley and Jeremiah --I miss them all more than they could know --both in and outside of work! I celebrated Jaryd's 21st birthday with him Joe and Siobhan, and it was like the old days of drunk babysitting --not much changed there either. Joe still puked in the corner --twice --although to his credit despite yelling angrily at people across the bar, no punches were thrown. Jaryd was still a slightly angry and sad drunk, although after he passed out on the make-shift bed in the middle of Siobhan's floor, he was very sweet to make sure that Siobhan and I kept warm during the night. He kept covering us with blankets while we were sleeping, then we'd get too hot and kick them off. A little bit later Jaryd would wake up freezing, notice that we too were blanket-less, assume we must be cold as well, and cover us up again. It was a fun cycle :) Good times! So here's to all my "people" --in Seattle and elsewhere --clink! :)

Me and Siobhan at the start of the b-day celebration --yes I'm jet lagged.

Jaryd and Joe

me and Josh at my first NFL game --go Seahawks!

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Why were some of these so hard to answer?

What was I doing 10 years ago?

1. Getting excited to go to my first homecoming dance ...ah to be sixteen again *rolls eyes*
2. Missing my summer job as a snow cone maker ... I heart snow cones!
3. Figuring out how I could meet Derek Jeter ...wait a minute ...
4. Babysitting. A lot.
5. Still getting over the enthusiasm of FINALLY being able to drive ;)

What are 5 things on my to do list

1. Go to my first NFL game --yay! Go Seahawks :)
2. Find a job in Florida
3. Finish Wuthering Heights
4. Go see Jersey Boys
5. Go to the Bronx Zoo

What are my favorite snacks? (By snacks you mean meals, right ;) )
1. Cottage cheese
2. Wheat thins
3. Popsicles
4. Twisted puffy Cheetos
5. Bananas

What would I do if I was a millionaire

1. Pay off my debt
2. Buy a cute little house on a tropical beach somewhere
3. Buy a normal sized house close to home
4. Go on an extended vaca to Greece
5. Put the rest in a savings account and live off the interest

Places I have lived
1. Logan, UT
2. Long Island, NY
3. Mission Viejo, CA
4. Seattle, WA
5. Manhattan, NY

Jobs I have had

1. Snow Cone Maker --still missin the days of free snow cones!
2. Telephone surveyor --one of the obnoxious people who call during dinner to ask if you'll take a survey.
3. CNA
4. LPN
5. RN

TV shows I love to watch:

1. Grey's Anatomy
2. SportsCenter
3. Friends
4. The OC
5. ER

8 things I am looking forward to:

1. Living on a warm sunny beach (FL, HI, etc)
2. Getting out of debt
3. Getting back in debt with a new car
4. Coming back to Seattle
5. Growing up
6. Coming back to Seattle
7. Basketball season
8. Coming back to Seattle

8 things on my wish list:

1. Getting my CEN
2. Money
3. Multiple tropical vacations
4. Men who don't exist
5. Shamu
6. Continued good fortune
7. Derek Jeter
8. My own hydroplane

8 things that happened yesterday:
1. Went to dinner with friends
2. Relived the Ozzie's/Pesos glory
3. Walked past H&M without going in --bonus points!!!
4. Slept from 0930-1530
5. Bought my first pair of ballet flats --in black patent leather
6. Watched pretty bartenders make pretty alcoholic beverages (not for me :) )
7. Started 2 IV's to cure post 21st b-day hangovers
8. Ate brownies and ice cream and half cooked garlic bread --and it was good!

Sunday, October 5, 2008

To Whom It May Concern:

Dear Florida Board of Nursing: How long can it possibly take to get fingerprint cards mailed from Florida to New York City? Apparently more than A MONTH!!! I could have rode my bicycle (assuming i had a bicycle) to Miami to pick them up and back by now. Send me my fingerprint cards!!!!

Dear Eye Doctor: Thank you for deciding that you needed to see me before allowing me to refill my contact perscription so that I can see. I understand that my eyes must have changed exponentially in the last 9 months since I've seen you, and it's perfectly logical for me to jet home to Logan to make an appointment to see you. Remember when I saw you 9 months ago (I know it seems like forever) and we discussed that I would be moving around the country so it would be a good idea to keep my normal two year interval between appointments, and would thus-ly need two years worth of contact lenses? What happened to that idea? I am not so much all about the risk of infection and corneal abrasion etc of wearing the same pair of contacts longer than recommended. And although I do look pretty damn cute in my glasses (see random thought #4) they get in the way at work. Which brings me to:

Dear creepy-going-to-go-postal-any-day-now-at-work-guy: Please leave me alone. It is creepy when you stand so close. When I am not friendly and outgoing toward you, I am not playing hard to get. When you are the only one not actively involved in saving a man's life, and I am forced to ask you to take my glasses off my face or risk having them drop on the bloody-vomit covered body of the man who I am doing chest compressions on, it is not a come on. It just means that I am compressing so hard that my glasses are sliding down my nose, and I would like you to remove them from my face and go place them somewhere away from the bloody vomit. This would not only save my glasses but give you something to do besides standing 2 inches behind me breathing on me as I try to save this man's life.

Dear Cute Man who hit on me on the way home today: Thank you. I know I told you I was married, but that doesn't mean I didn't secretly appreciate being asked, "Excuse me ...can we get to know each other and ...ya know ...socialize?" As I am walking home in rain drenched scrubs after working a twelve hour shift with a greasy face and messy hair in a messy ponytail.

Dear MTA: Thank you first for suspending all express train service this weekend so I can enjoy an extra 15 minutes on an over-packed subway while you maintain the express tracks. Thank you also for 'maintaining' the express tracks which always seem to run without a problem instead of the local track which broke a rail today suspending all subway service from 110th St. and 42nd St. I enjoyed choosing between a 70 block walk home in the pouring rain, or a 6 block walk to sit on a bus for 30 minutes.

Dear no-longer drunk and high on PCP and Crack 65 year old man: Thank you for buying an orange soda for me the other day at work. Although I told you no thank you, and to enjoy it for yourself, I want you to know that it honestly made my day that you would do that for me. You are a very pleasant and sweet man when you are not screaming profanities at us. You should not do drugs so you can be sweet and pleasant all the time.

Dear hot paramedic: Thank you for offering to drive me to the deli three blocks away in your ambulance at 2:30 this morning (perhaps wearing the glasses more often won't be such a bad thing :) ). I appreciated it, but I was really enjoying the nice walk. Perhaps next time you won't get sent out on another call so soon and I'll take you up on your offer. Perhaps next time when you don't have other medics in the back of the ambulance we can discuss other ways to spend my break. Call me.

PS: Dear Hot Paramedic, please send a friend hot paramedic to Utah to entertain my friend Jill on her breaks. The hospital she works at has many really big elevators and stairwells.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Nature Therapy

That's right, nature therapy. I'm a big fan. I don't know what it is about being out in nature, but there is something so serene and calming and centering about it. It is wonderful! Here in Manhattan we do nature in the form of parks. New York City does parks really well. I know that everyone thinks bright lights and big buildings and times square and Broadway and busy-ness when they think of the city; the city certainly does all those things well too. But they do parks really well --did I say that already? And not just Central Park. The first time I came to the city Central Park was my favorite place outside of Yankee Stadium. It was the only park I went to. When I lived out on Long Island, it didn't take long before Bryant Park was my favorite. Now, I'm in an adventurous mood and trying to hit all the local scenes, and I have had two favorites since I've lived in the city. First Riverside Park, and most recently Fort Tryon Park. Both of these are on the upper west side. Riverside park actually goes from right by my house all the way up the island and has a beautiful running trail right on the Hudson River. I found Fort Tryon Park the other day on the recommendation from a friend at work. I was having an icky day and needed somewhere where I could be outside in the daylight and dressed in normal clothes instead of scrubs. I walked out of the subway station into the park and instantly my bad mood evaporated! It was just being there. In the middle of the trees and the flowers, with quiet. And birds and squirrels playing in the trees. I walked all around and had a great time.

It's really kind of funny. When I moved from NY to the OC, I kept doing things in Cali that made me remember the city easier. When I moved from the OC to Seattle, I spent forever at Elliot Bay and at all of what they called "beaches" trying to keep the SoCal spirit. And now that I'm back in the city, I find myself seeking out lush green parks, and salty fish-y boardwalks, and looking forward to overcast days because it eases my homesickness for Seattle. I don't know how I'm ever going to pick a place to settle down! But in the meantime, enjoy some pics from my nature therapy over the past month!

Riverside Park

Central Park

Not a park, but twilight from my balcony --still nature-y :)

Morningside Park

Butterflies in Fort Tryon Park --In October :)

Fort Tryon

Fort Tryon

Me in Fort Tryon

George Washington Bridge at dusk from Fort Tryon Park